


When It's Over

by theianitor



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M, Mature because Mentions Sex, Memories, Past Relationship(s), Realization
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-26
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2019-04-08 15:29:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14108421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theianitor/pseuds/theianitor
Summary: Waiting for the drivers to come up to the podium after the Australian GP, Mark realizes a few things.





	When It's Over

**Author's Note:**

> A conversation with a good friend brought forth a short little fic. <3 (The sex mentioned is very brief, but I always think it's best to "tag up".)

\- 2018 -

It had been over for a long time, several years in fact, but it still stirred something inside him when he saw that look in Sebastian’s eyes. Especially when it wasn’t for him. Not anymore. Watching on the monitors gave him a vivid sense of going back in time, watching the races from home or wherever he happened to be, but it didn’t leave him with the wistful longing it had held in the beginning. With a sudden sense of how many years had actually passed, he realized the same went for that look from Sebastian, the one he knew so very well; it didn’t hurt anymore. It hadn’t hurt for a long time.

Sebastian had looked at him like that so many times it was impossible to count. His face was like an open book. It was something Mark had always loved and admired about Seb, his complete honesty about his emotions. While he might not _say_ the whole truth, it was always there, in his eyes, across his lips, written all over his face. Sebastian had looked at him like that and he had been wary but curious to find out what the young German actually meant.

Everything, seemed to be the answer. Sebastian was a whirlwind, which brought down his defenses with almost careless ease and made his intentions perfectly clear. Mark had figured it was harmless fun, just blowing off steam, but as they had worn each other out through the night, still high on adrenaline and with muscles pushed beyond the soreness and exhaustion of racing, he’d found himself in that second of doubt and vain hope just as Sebastian looked him right in the eyes.

“I love you,” Seb had whispered with a soft smile, his breath hot against Mark’s sweaty skin. Then he’d tipped his head forward, too uncoordinated to kiss anymore but still mouthing at Mark’s neck, still clinging to his shoulders and trying to keep the rhythm between them, like it was something he _had_ to do. Mark had regained enough strength to turn them both over, pinning Sebastian to the bed with his hair sticking to his forehead and his back sticking to the sheets, and said it back to him as many times as he could find air to.

After that the looks had been even clearer. He was almost surprised that nobody asked, that nobody seemed to know. How could they not see?

Then it ended the way it did. Even before he left he could see Seb handling things better than he was, and when he saw those soft, longing looks coming back he realized why.

Kimi.

Mark had been angry. Jealous. Unaccepting. He didn’t do anything about it, but he certainly didn’t like it. Now he looked back on it and in a way, he understood. Sebastian hadn’t needed his strong and tempestuous emotions in return. He needed a rock. A safe place to be, a stable port in his own storm.

 

Now he looked on as Seb, no longer the young man he had gotten to know, still displayed his emotions so clearly, putting it out there for all to see if they’d only look – and saw them reflected in the one everyone thought either above or below such trivialities as emotions and bonds. Mark found himself smiling, and was a little surprised. But it didn’t hurt. It hadn’t hurt for a long time now.

Sebastian’s hug in public, on the podium that first time after so long, had come after they had already talked their problems out. Mark saw it again as Seb putting his emotions out there. They were fine, and Mark saw his return of the hug as his own confirmation of moving on, his blessing, in a way, and hoped Seb took it as such. He was fine. He had moved on too.

 

This year Sebastian touched him carefully, a friendly pat, not going quite so far as a hug and especially not one as long and hard as the previous years, but to Mark it was obvious why. Kimi, ever-stoic and composed, didn’t prevent their contact but was very much present, protecting his whirlwind. Mark understood, and wasn’t about to brave any such storms. He nodded to Kimi, obviously one of the few well-versed enough in small gestures to get the full meaning of it. His shoulders came down and he left them to it. There was a sense of finality that hadn’t been there before: maybe it was _because_ of Kimi’s blatant display. Blatant to Mark, anyway. In a way, it reassured him. Sebastian was safe.

As he walked through the press-area later that evening he caught sight of Fernando, talking to a couple of reporters, smiling and talking with his hands, as ever. The Spaniard looked up and saw him. His smile shifted, if only slightly, to a more private one, a closer one, one that despite being plainly visible was only for Mark. Mark returned it, feeling stable and safe. Even if nobody else could see it, things had a way of working out. He genuinely hoped Sebastian was happy. He certainly was.

 

\- The End -

**Author's Note:**

> All in good fun, as usual! :)  
> Thanks for the read. <3


End file.
